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Thursday, November 13, 2008

Jeff Foxworthy's Take on Teachers

YOU KNOW YOU ARE A TEACHER IF:
1. You can hear 25 voices behind you and know exactly which one belongs to the child out of line.

2. You get a secret thrill out of laminating something.

3. You walk into a store and hear the words "its Ms/Mr. _________" and know you have been spotted.

4. You have 25 people that accidentally call you Mom/Dad at one time or another.

5. You can eat a multi-course meal in under twenty-five minutes.

6. You've trained yourself to go to the bathroom at two distinct times of the day: lunch and conference period .

7. You start saving other people's trash, because most likely, you can use that toilet paper tube or plastic butter tub for something in the classroom.

8. You believe the teachers' lounge should be equipped with a margarita machine.

9. You want to slap the next person who says "Must be nice to work 7 to 3 and have summers off."

10. You believe chocolate is a food group.

11. You can tell if it's a full moon without ever looking outside.

12. You believe that unspeakable evils will befall you if anyone says "Boy, the kids sure are mellow today."

13. You feel the urge to talk to strange children and correct their behavior when you are out in public.

14. You believe in aerial spraying of Ritalin.

15. You think caffeine should be available in intravenous form.

16. You spend more money on school stuff than you do on your own children.

17. You can't pass the school supply aisle without getting at least five items!

18. You find true beauty in a can full of perfectly sharpened pencils.

19. You are secretly addicted to hand sanitizer

20. You understand instantaneously why a child behaves a certain way after meeting his or her parents.

4 comments:

Leanna said...

I LOVE THIS! I relate to every single one of those!

Mandy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Mandy said...

Me too! I've actually had to catch myself and bite my tongue not to correct children in public. Or at least use my loud teacher snap at them. :) ha ha!

That was me that just deleted the last comment. I had spelled "teacher" wrong. Can't be having a teacher doing that! Maybe that's what I get for correctly other peoples' kids. :)

JNB said...

This is a cute list! I copied it and sent it to a friend of mine :)